my best friend has a breakdown on the couch of our Paris apartment and i say that’s it, we’re playing Billy Joel

which means i love you and i’m sorry i can’t hug the fear out of you / i’m just bare bones
and a fucked up heart i promise / i’m learning to be stronger / i’ll be your piano man, you
my Virginia, my uptown girl, my crazy child / we’ll get a cat and call it cat / too afraid to
name anything beside ourselves / when you meow in sync to the opening notes of New
York state of mind / the neighbours will clap outstretched from their windowsills / i have
bribed their applause just for you / because babe you’re still rock and roll to me / even
with your hummingbird heart and fresh tears / you love me so openly / it splits me in
two / i understand you so deeply / it carves out your ribs / you are a lover, there is
nothing i could do that’d make you hate me / but i’m an artist, there is nothing you could
say that’d make me leave you / we’ll hang disco balls in our living room to refract the light
pouring out of us / like we’re dancing in the last gay bar on earth / we’ll be so beautiful /
your butchness and my question mark gender / i’ll learn how to bake croissants / you’ll
learn how to eat without leaving any crumbs / we’ll knead pizza from scratch and make
a mess of our culture / our kitchen the only Italian restaurant to fill our mouths with
anything other than bitterness / let me spoon feed you this life until you believe it / your
lips ripe like heirloom tomatoes / we’re both bad people but there is no universe in which
i don’t rest my head in your lap / your fingers tangled in my fishnet hair / no universe is
worth our time if i can’t rub your back until you fall asleep / my hands like crickets tip
toeing across your shoulder blades / proof of a love that leaves no scars / the record
player crackles slightly / limping through the last chorus of the night is still young / the
night is still young / i have already told you all that my love can build / the night won’t be
young forever / our hands trembling in flight like parakeets / afraid the night will age
before we’re ready to leave the club / my Virginia, my uptown girl, my crazy child, i want
to be your piano man / please / before the night is over / tell me you can hold my heart
without spilling.

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Naima Fiumara (she/they) is a queer poet born and raised in Italy. Recently she’s been spending most of her time trying to reconcile who they are with who they were meant to be. They can be found on Instagram & Tumblr @chaosunderwater.