Prayer of Contrition

To the One and Only God, who is the Trinity—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—we pray for Sister Mary Catherine and Sister Mary Margaret, sledding over the clear blue water in the fish bowl (You can’t miss them) on two sharp runners, long black habits, coifs, wimples and veils be damned, having the most fun they have ever had (oh God, forgive them their sins, they are heartily sorry for offending Thee).

Prayer of Petition

To the One and Only God, who is the Trinity—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—we pray for Sister Mary Catherine and Sister Mary Margaret who, like hands in prayer, sit tightly together, Sister Mary Catherine the pilot, Sister Mary Margaret, clutching her tunic from behind. Forgive Sister Mary Catherine, her toothy grin, the kind found on a sinner riding the roller coaster of life, stomach in mouth, ready to take the plunge. Forgive Sister Mary Margaret, beatific copilot, struggling to understand her true feelings, her photochromatic lenses buttressing the glare of this sinful day.

Prayer of Thanksgiving

To the One and Only God, who is the Trinity—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—we pray for the octopus looking heavenward, his slit-eye widely tracking the portentous shadow above. As You know, having created him, his species is some 296 million years old—far older than the black and white religion of Sister Mary Catherine and Sister Mary Margaret by some two hundred ninety-five million nine hundred ninety-eight thousand years. His heart is a trinity, his blood, true blue. He is lonely. Father, forgive this shy creature his cardinal sins, his inconsolable desires.